WASHINGTON — The Semiquincentennial Commission confirmed Monday that the nation's 250th birthday celebrations will be underwritten by corporate leasing agreements attached to the first ten amendments. Commission Chair Gavin McCallister noted that while freedom of speech is inalienable, the branding rights are negotiable. "We're not selling the rights, just the association," said Commission CFO Linda Sterner.
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.

250th Anniversary Committee Opens Bidding On Bill Of Rights Sponsorship Slots
Expert Weighs In
“We're not selling the rights, just the association”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.


