WASHINGTON — The Pentagon announced Tuesday that future airstrikes will operate on a tiered subscription basis, requiring Congress to renew access monthly. Officials noted that premium tiers include heavier ordnance and populated zones. "Basic plan only covers desert testing," said Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth. "If you want regime change, you need to upgrade to Platinum."
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
Pentagon Announces Future Airstrikes Will Operate On Tiered Subscription Basis
Expert Weighs In
“Basic plan only covers desert testing. If you want regime change, you need to upgrade to Platinum.”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
