WASHINGTON — Senior aides confirmed Tuesday that declaring an Iran ceasefire imminent satisfies all diplomatic requirements, rendering the agreement obsolete. Resources shift to press briefings. "Why sign a paper when we can just hold a podium?" asked Senior Advisor Jason Miller. "The public stops counting after 35, so the 36th announcement carries no risk."
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
White House Formalizes Policy Where Claiming Deal Exists Replaces Need For Actual Deal
Expert Weighs In
“The public stops counting after 35, so the 36th announcement carries no risk.”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
