MAR-A-LAGO — The Trump Campaign announced Wednesday that citizens citing poll data contradicting the President's foreign policy will be classified as enemy combatants. Officials stated the 69% opposition figure constitutes material support for Iran. "If the numbers don't match the vibe, the numbers are treason," said Campaign Legal Director Alan Kress.
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.

Trump Campaign Classifies Dissenting Poll Data As Material Support For Iran
Expert Weighs In
“If the numbers don't match the vibe, the numbers are treason”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.


