WASHINGTON — The State Department confirmed Monday that all ceasefire violations must be documented via verified Truth Social reply threads to qualify for UN review. Officials stated airstrikes lacking accompanying all-caps captions would not count toward de-escalation metrics. 'If it isn't posted with three exclamation points, it didn't happen,' said National Security Advisor Thomas Vance.
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.

White House Requires Ceasefire Violations Be Submitted As Truth Social Reply Threads
Expert Weighs In
“If it isn't posted with three exclamation points, it didn't happen”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.


