WASHINGTON — FEMA confirmed Monday that disaster relief applications must now include a field estimating the state's projected electoral vote contribution. Governors seeking flood aid were instructed to attach polling data alongside damage assessments. "Disasters are expensive. Loyalty is cheaper," said FEMA Regional Director Alan Kress. "If you vote wrong, buy sandbags."
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
FEMA Updates Disaster Grant Form To Include Projected Electoral Vote Contribution
Expert Weighs In
“Disasters are expensive. Loyalty is cheaper.”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
