WASHINGTON — The Biden campaign confirmed that political progress will now be measured exclusively by the mileage of the former first lady's book tour bus. Officials stated stalled polling is irrelevant as long as the vehicle remains in motion. "Things are going to move forward," said Director Alan Sternglass. "The voters are just scenery passing the window."
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
Jill Biden Defines Campaign Progress As Literal Movement Of Book Tour Bus
Expert Weighs In
“The voters are just scenery passing the window.”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
