WASHINGTON — The Department of Justice confirmed Wednesday that the $1.776 billion allocated for wrongful prosecution compensation will instead cover legal fees for the attorneys who designed the fund. Officials stated that defending the fund's existence required immediate liquidity, leaving no capital for actual restitution. Claimants were offered tax vouchers valid for future fines.
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
DOJ Redirects $1.776B Wrongful Prosecution Fund To Pay Lawyers Who Drafted Fund
Expert Weighs In
“Admitting we wronged you would undermine our authority to wrong you again.”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.
