JERUSALEM — Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu announced today that the U.S.-brokered ceasefire will be delayed until analysts locate a suitable enemy matching previous specifications. Citizens welcomed the delay, citing concerns over sudden stability. "A functioning state requires an existential threat," said Coalition Chairman Yariv Levin. "We are scouting neighboring regions for compliance."
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.

Netanyahu Delays Peace Pending Identification Of Suitable Enemy
Expert Weighs In
“A functioning state requires an existential threat”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.


