NEWARK — NJ Transit confirmed its flawless World Cup service will become standard policy, meaning trains will now only depart if they are already at the destination platform. Officials noted this eliminates travel time. Commuters praised the guaranteed arrival times. "Movement is the primary cause of delays," said Chief Operations Officer Gary Boland.
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.

NJ Transit To Maintain World Cup Punctuality By Never Leaving Station
Expert Weighs In
“Movement is the primary cause of delays”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.


